Some people seem to be born with an easy and self-confident manner. They breeze into meetings and networking events and seem to be at ease with themselves and whatever is taking place, a confidence that is infectious and rubs off on others.
For most of us we really have to work more at this and to overcome hesitation or some measure of self-doubt. As Sheryl Sandberg said her book Lean In talking particularly about women but recognising quite rightly that to applies to men as well “Like so many things a lack of confidence can become a self-fulfilling prophecy”. In other words, because you are not confident you will perform well then you don’t even though you are perfectly able to do so. She goes on to say “This phenomenon of capable people being plagued by doubt has a name – the imposter syndrome.”
The same is true in sport – see this blog Developing confidence in sport which says In every interview I ask the same question to each person “ What do you think is the most important psychological factor needed to excel in sport?”
The response: Self Confidence, Self Belief.
The football manager Arsene Wenger summed this up If you do not believe you can do it then you have no chance at all.
In business and in sport there are actually some simple actions we can take that build confidence. Sheryl Sandberg suggests faking a smile or adopting a “power pose” like extending your limbs. I find just getting up from the table and walking around the room can help. Here is an interesting Harvard Business Review article on overcoming barriers to confidence which suggests that Confidence is an expectation of a positive outcome.
And also, it can be an advantage not to take confidence to its extreme. As the British swimmer Adam Peaty commented There is a very thin line between confidence and arrogance. I think professional people appreciate dealing with colleagues who are confident but at the same time capable of being sympathetic and understanding.
Ultimately as Sir Edmund Hillary said It is not the mountain we conquer, but ourselves.
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