In these days working from home, initially from necessity and now from choice, has become an everyday norm for many of us around the globe. There is no stressful commute: we just get out of bed have breakfast, deal with any family matters, like taking the children to school – and then go into our study/spare room/ attic room or even bedroom, switch on our computers and “off to work we go”. We have lots of Teams and Zoom calls and meetings when we “communicate” with colleagues, but generally just focusing on work issues. Gone then for the most part are those days when we had lots of informal contact with colleagues, direct reports and bosses. Open plan offices encourage and facilitate such conversations with those sitting around you. And then there are the so called “water cooler breaks” where we have or at least had many useful unstructured conversations. These could be in your place of work or over a coffee at Starbucks, Pret a Manger or Costa. From this you get a much better feel for issues and what colleagues really think. I now try to make a habit, even though I may have no face to face meetings, to go into one of our offices at least once a week for this informal networking. This week in addition to discussing various work matters and doing various Teams calls, I was able to bounce some ideas off colleagues and said hallo to our European Chief Executive.

And I am not alone in thinking this. See this blog Water Cooler Talk: 6 Tips on How to Make It More Beneficial for Your Team which commences: 
 
“Casual conversations in the workplace – sometimes known as ‘water cooler talk’ can have many benefits when it comes to team bonding and relationship building, which in turn is beneficial for productivity and employee morale. Unfortunately, many managers see it as unproductive time and actively discourage it. With the right attitude and approach to watercooler talk, you can harness its usefulness.”

It then proposes the benefits these breaks bring include:

• It helps to build relationships and assists with collaboration
• It helps with problem solving and innovation
• Breaks are beneficial for wellbeing

See also this blog Water Cooler Chat – 11 Smart Reasons to Encourage It which says this  “is what happens when colleagues take a break from work and socialize with each other. It’s a chance to let everyone reset by talking about less stressful things, like hobbies and personal interests—fun topics not associated with work.”
It observes that although “some managers think that water cooler chat hinders productivity in the workplace” there are in fact many benefits including:

• It builds the company culture.
• It brings people out of their shells.
• It provides casual facetime with management.

It also suggests some Do’s and Don’ts like "Do discuss interests“  and "Don't discuss salary or promotions.” concluding:

“Water cooler chat is just as important (if not more so) in the digital age than ever before. The best managers already know it’s beneficial—and you’re holding your teams back if you do not give them the freedom to be human. All you have to do is articulate a set of guidelines, put trust in the people you hired, and let people talk.”

There is even a guide Benefits of Spontaneous Water Cooler Chats: The Ultimate Guide which defines the topic as follows:

“conversations that engage when they take a break from work and socialize with each other over a trip to the water cooler or drinking fountain. The setting around the drinking area is often less formal, allowing employees to engage in casual talk and break the monotony of being stuck at the desk all day.”
And then lists benefits including “No agenda conversations/meetings and brainstorming.”

Concluding:

“Water cooler talks do not deserve the negative connotations often attached to them. They play a massive role in helping employees de-stress, get out of their shells, and get to know each other while building personal connections that make working together easier.”

The really interesting thing about this topic is that it is also possible to encourage “virtual water cooler breaks”, developing our online work behaviour to encompass more informal contact.  See this Forbes article Returning To The Virtual Watercooler: How To Improve Your Company's Culture With A Remote Team which proposes that you create virtual downtime: 

“Add in opportunities and norms that encourage casual interactions. As an example, my company orders lunch for everyone and has it delivered to their homes ahead of our virtual all-hands meetings.”
It also suggests “schedule calls five minutes off the hour or half-hour to give time for pre-meeting banter”.

See also this blog The Virtual Water Cooler | Why you need it + how to do it which says “The answer is to create a remote version — the virtual water cooler. This is a digital situation that allows people to bond in a way similar to the in-person opportunities that exist in the physical office. While the scenarios may have to be more structured rather than spontaneous, working from home is no excuse to stop the conversation!”

It proposes some ideas to achieve this:

“1. Have a question of the day
An easy way to keep the conversation happening is to have an ice breaker question of the day asked by a designated person in the company’s digital chatroom of choice (i.e. Slack, Google Hangouts, etc.).
2. Play a game
During a company virtual meeting on a video call, try playing an online game for Zoom! This allows team members to loosen up and feel more comfortable and connected to the people on the other side of the screen.
3. Shout out team members
The whole point of facilitating a virtual water cooler is to help bridge the conversational gaps that happen from remote work. One way to get people talking is to shout out team members and acknowledge their accomplishments!”

I also like this blog What is a virtual water cooler & how to set one up which proposes “By creating a shared digital space intentionally designed for informal interaction, you can offer employees an avenue to better understand one another, catch up on events they may have missed, join in conversations (even asynchronously), share photos or stories, or even connect directly by voice or video conferencing.”

And finally have a look at this BBC article The rise of the ‘virtual water cooler’ commenting generally: 
“In the health sector, researchers have identified how corridor conversations are an important way to deal with crises and complexity. These impromptu encounters can often result in colleagues (often unknowingly) working out how to fix problems, deal with crises, de-stress, and avoid reinventing the wheel.
These are “liminal spaces” that are beyond formal definition. As soon as we try to design them too tightly, they tend to flee elsewhere – the stairwell, the bus stop, the dead space at the back of the building.”

And then on the virtual world:
“The online water coolers and corridors can be found in sidebar conversations in the one-on-one chats in Zoom meetings. You’ll find people creating informal WhatsApp groups for out-of-earshot commenting, alongside the more formal channels of online conferences.”

It discusses how apps might help achieve this but observes “It’s more likely that the real virtual water cooler will pop up outside of the official channels.”

Water cooler conversations may promote work success, but ultimately it’s about people finding ways to get on in the physical or virtual workspace which coincidentally improve work.
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As Kal Penn the American actor, author, and former White House staff member shrewdly observed:
“The water cooler conversation in every job I've had is sports, it's what did you do this weekend, it's 'How are your parents doing?'”

​My Apple watch has a fall detection system that reacts to a hard fall. I have triggered this a few times accidentally when bending over and then straightening up quickly. It taps your wrist, sounds an alarm and displays an alert. You can tap “I’m OK” or, if you really have say fallen off your bike and are hurt, you can make an emergency call. The thing about falling is not so much that it happens, but what you do afterwards to recover and get right back up.
In life and our professional work, we will inevitably experience low moments when we have metaphorically fallen. I experienced one such earlier this year when I was ill and hospitalised. However, I have managed to “get back up” and have now happily returned to work. It is I suggest how we deal with adversity in our personal and working lives that ultimately defines us as people and as professionals.
I acted once for a supplier on a major global contract negotiation in the retail sector. We spent literally months endlessly negotiating the minutiae of terms and conditions, project implementation  and service levels. The discussions were tense and we were thrown out of the negotiation twice by the customer for being unreasonable - about limits of liability as I recall. We finally, after many late nights ,came to an agreement and the contract, which was to be signed in hard copy, was printed out by the customer’s lawyers. I was in their office checking the document when the bombshell dropped; the customer’s US parent (which hitherto had no involvement in the discussions) contacted our senior management and said they would not sign without a 10% price drop. Our bid manager and others in our team were all for throwing in the towel and going home. However, with some financial machinations were able to come up with an offer acceptable to the customer and its parent – and we signed the next day just before our financial year end. We definitely stumbled but got up again to succeed.
See this blog Get Back Up When You Fall Down: How to Overcome Failure by the author Mike Robbins who says:
“Remember: it’s okay to do it wrong. Too often, sadly, we fall or make a mistake, and then decide we can’t get back up. Boldness is about having the courage, willingness, and commitment to get up when we fall – even if we’re scared or don’t think we can.”
and observes that failure should be seen as an opportunity to learn: 
“Facing difficulties in our life can be incredibly beneficial – if we choose to allow our challenges to be growth opportunities.”
See also this really good Forbes article Embracing The Fall: How To Be OK With And Grow From Failure which applies the analogy of rock climbing and fearing a particularly difficult section and sets out some pertinent lessons learned including
“How many times do we do this to ourselves in business? Creating our own failure by being afraid of failure in itself? You fail either way with that mindset. Trust in yourself and the work you have already put into your business. If you are not willing to try, you will always fall short.”
and
“Look for new solutions and ways to accomplish your goals as well as your company’s goals. By staying open-minded, you will be more apt to see the path to success.”
I also like this blog On Falling Down and Getting Up from Psychology Today which commences:
“Challenges are a part of life. In evolutionary terms, challenges are biological stresses that stimulate the adaptations that we see in the diversity of life all around us. When we take the long view it's easier to see that challenges, and the adaptations that arise to meet those challenges, are an important part of life and living.”
and goes on to say:
“This idea of falling down and getting up is also found in the Japanese phrase "nana korobi ya oki". This literally means "seven falls with eight getting up". On first reading it seems the math is a bit messed up with 8 times up with only 7 down. But the figurative meaning resonates with me as in no matter how many times you get knocked down, stand up.a
It’s really all about resilience – bounce backability if that is permitted English. See another Forbes blog Building Resilience In The Workplace: Strategies For Success which commences
“In today's rapidly evolving workplace, resilience is a crucial skill that empowers individuals to navigate challenges, bounce back from setbacks and maintain high performance. Building resilience enhances your ability to adapt to change, but it also promotes well-being and encourages a positive work environment.”
and goes on to “explore practical habits for cultivating resilience in the workplace” including:

• Develop A Growth Mindset
• Practice Problem-Solving and Decision-Making Skills
• Prioritize Self-Care

Here are some great quotes about getting right back up, dusting yourself down and getting on with it.
“If you get up one more time than you fall, you will make it through.” Chinese Proverb
“Falling down is part of life. Getting back up is living.” Anonymous
“Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.” Confucius
“When life knocks you down, try to land on your back. Because if you can look up, you can get up. Let your reason get you back up.”  The American politician and motivational speaker Les Brown.
“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.” Winston Churchill
 

If like me you are a sports fan then you will probably have watched some of the great tennis at Wimbledon over the past two weeks. When I was younger I played in the finals at my local tennis club near Worcester. It was some time ago and  I was playing with a wooden Dunlop Maxply Fort racket. Some of you may remember these sorts of rackets which were the forerunner of steel and now various combinations of graphite. I see some are now sold as vintage rackets and fetch £100 plus on eBay. I should have kept mine! Anyway, I was knocking up with a friend when I broke a string in my racket: this was a huge setback because I did not have a spare racket – unlike the Wimbledon players who have at least six, and can even get them repaired during a match. I played on - and despite, maybe even because of,  this handicap won the men’s singles, beating the club favourite and then teaming up with him to win the doubles. If anything, the broken string motivated me  and removed any nerves because I just had to get on and adjust my game accordingly.

Overcoming adversity is a trait we need in our professional lives because inevitably we will encounter unexpected difficult times and problems in our personal and working lives. It is how we deal with these rather than the fact that they occur which really matters. See this good article When adversity strikes proposing adopting a positive mindset and suggesting strategies for dealing with crises including:

• Stop making excuses - Elaborate excuses and denial are two common responses to failure.
• Write - Sometimes it's freeing to write your thoughts down on paper.
• Let each success energise you - No matter how big or how small, celebrate your accomplishments.

It also sagely observes 

“Ultimately, without adversity, there are no opportunities for growth or building resilience. Adversity teaches us about ourselves, about being uncomfortable, and how to endure. Without it, we may never discover our inner strength. In the wise words of Buddha: "Endurance is one of the most difficult disciplines, but it is to the one who endures that the final victory comes."”

See this Forbes article 11 Ways To Turn Adversity Into Opportunity which starts with a great quote “We must embrace pain and burn it as fuel for our journey.” by the Japanese novelist Kenji Miyazawa and goes onto suggest “ways to turn adversity into opportunity” including Embrace it, Practice self-compassion and Make humour your ally.

See also this good article Learn how to Overcome Adversity – How to Build Resilience and Overcome `Anythingwhich commences: 

“Anyone who has ever achieved something worthwhile has had challenges and setbacks – because anything that is worth doing is going to be difficult. Overcoming adversity is a necessary step on the road to greatness.

Philosopher Edmund Burke said, “He that wrestles with us strengthens our nerves and sharpens our skill. Our antagonist is our helper.” Life is the worthy opponent – the antagonist – we all need to grow. When you have the right tools to overcome adversity, you embrace the situation as a helper, rather than letting it stop you from achieving your goals and reaching your dreams.”

It then sets out ten ways to deal with such difficulties including

• Be Prepared - Working on overcoming adversity happens before the tough situation even happens.
• Practice Positivity - Take a step back and reframe the problem in a positive way.
• Find the Lesson - Realizing that life happens for you, not to you, is key to overcoming adversity. Every event in your life can teach you something.

This Harvard Business Review article How to Bounce Back from Adversity  has some sound advice: “Whatever your initial reaction, however, the challenge is to turn a negative experience into a productive one—that is, to counter adversity with resilience. Psychological resilience is the capacity to respond quickly and constructively to crises.” It also comments  “We believe that managers can build high levels of resilience in themselves and their teams by taking charge of how they think about adversity.”

There are also many examples to follow such as Helen Keller who became a successful writer despite being blind and deaf and JK Rowling who was a struggling single mother before publishing Harry Potter – see this blog 17 Best Adversity Examples. Indeed, the Harry Potter book was amazingly rejected by 12 different publishing houses. Even the Beatles were turned down by four respected recording companies –that really was a mistake!

John McEnroe said “What is the single most important quality of a tennis champion? I would have to say desire, staying in there and winning matches when you are not playing that well.”

While Roger Federer commented “I’ve faced many adversities: playing with injuries and while hurt, sick, jet–lagged. But I see these adversities as a great challenge and feel that it is a privilege to be in this position.”
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As it says over the gates to Centre Court at Wimbledon in Rudyard Kipling’s immortal words “If you can meet with triumph and disaster and treat those two impostors just the same.”

Complexity is defined in the Cambridge Dictionary as “involving a lot of different parts, in a way that is difficult to understand.” As professional people we deal as a matter of course with complex subject matter. An ability to master an intricate set of facts and analyse them to produce a coherent conclusion is very much a requirement of our profession. When we give a presentation we want to  make sure our audience understands the minutiae of our subject matter. We put our heart out there with complex PowerPoint slides and copious notes. This however means it is easy to overcomplicate an opinion, diagnosis or presentation which, whilst it may be professionally satisfying, misses a critical point. Beauty as they say is in the eye of the beholder, who is the person we are seeking to engage and explain the topic to in a way they can take on board.

The chief executive or finance director of your client will be a busy person. They will not be interested or have the time to digest complex legal rationale. They will generally want to know if they can or cannot take a course of action, and if they do what the risk is. I recall the head of legal at a company I worked for explaining to  the board of directors the papers they were approving for a complex bond issue – the first in the service industry. I was working for him on this and had helped go through and resolve a myriad of issues. The documentation was extensive and complex. Yet my boss simplified all of this in plain language all could understand and assimilate in 10 minutes so they appreciated what they were committing the company to.

We obtained the required approval and had to fly to Luxembourg for the completion for tax reasons. I was charged with organising the trip, but had to go to my boss to explain we could not get the flights we wanted for the whole team. He looked up for a moment from the documents he was perusing and solved my seemingly complex problem very simply – “hire a jet” he said, and I did just that! 

A prerequisite of avoiding complexity is a true in depth understanding in the first place. Those with the greatest ability to communicate simply are often accomplished professionals who fully comprehend their subject matter – and yet are humble enough to recognise how much they still have to learn. My Tai Chi instructor confesses that after 35 years he is still learning about this soft martial art. As a result, he can relate to and explain complex moves in a way beginners like me can understand. He like my former boss is a true expert.

As professional people we are inherently good at what we do and therein lies some of the problem. See this article Why People Over-Complicate What They’re Good At observing “People enjoy others marvelling at their level of proficiency in a certain domain.” Because of this: “There is a tendency for them to over-complicate their description of what they do whilst teaching others how to do it.”

It seems that we suffer from “complexity bias” - our tendency to believe that complex solutions are better than simple ones. This is not new: see this article in The New Scientist Occam’s Razor which “is a principle often attributed to 14th century friar William of Ockham that says that if you have two competing ideas to explain the same phenomenon, you should prefer the simpler one.”

In fact, as this short blog says We Overcomplicate the Things We Don’t understand. Comments like “What we need is a more detailed plan, so we are all on the same page.” can actually reveal a lack of understanding. Over complexity is a particular challenge in the design of IT systems. See this article  The Rise and Fall of Overcomplicated Systemsobserving that “Old Mercedes 280E cars from the 80s still straggle along in deepest darkest Africa because they’re easy to repair using simple and standard parts unlike many of today’s modern cars.” It has some good advice including:
“Why design a system which only the elitist few can understand?”
“When deadlines are critical, building a complicated solution is extremely risky.”
“The clearer a project’s purpose and outcome, the easier it is to keep the system focused and simple.”

I have experienced this in practice in IT some years ago when we developed an all singing and dancing contracts management system – the only problem was nobody wanted to use it because it was just too complex.

See this Forbes article Current Technology Only Manages To Complicate Things observing that “Instead of making life simpler, technology has made it more complicated.” and “The biggest wastes of time, money and resources for an enterprise come from complex systems. If you’ve ever been a part of a project that involved large-scale data integration, you know exactly what a massive problem it is. And it’s a problem that isn’t going away with current solutions.”

I also like this Harvard Business Review article How to Stop Overthinking Everything which says “Deliberation is an admirable and essential leadership quality that undoubtedly produces better outcomes. But there comes a point in decision making where helpful contemplation turns into overthinking.” It advocates amongst other things that you:

• Put aside perfectionism
• Right size the problem
• Leverage the underestimated power of intuition

On the use of intuition it comments:
 
“In fact, research shows that pairing intuition with analytical thinking helps you make better, faster, and more accurate decisions and gives you more confidence in your choices than relying on intellect alone. In one study, car buyers who used only careful analysis were ultimately happy with their purchases about a quarter of the time. Meanwhile, those who made intuitive purchases were happy 60 percent of the time.”

Winston Churchill said “Out of intense complexities, intense simplicities emerge”.

While Richard Branson observed “Complexity is your enemy. Any fool can make something complicated. It is hard to keep things simple.”
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And Confucius in 500 B.C. was quoted as saying, “Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.”
 

I once participated in a mediation between two large and high-profile organisations. The mediator was in his eighties, had had a heart bypass and was a former high profile US antitrust lawyer. He decided to call the senior executives of the contending parties together in a room. The two individuals sparked off each other and each loudly stated their respective positions without listening to the other. The mediator suddenly raised his right hand, waited until everybody stopped talking and looked at him in surprise, the said in a loud voice “Hold the phone: there’s too many egos in the room!” This stopped the jockeying for position in its tracks and facilitated a more collaborative discussion which ultimately resulted in a settlement.

This illustrates the skill set required to have a presence at and influence meetings, controlling proceedings when needed. What the mediator exhibited was “Executive Presence”.

See this Forbes article Executive Presence: What Is It, Why You Need It And How To Get It which commences:

“Executive presence!” It’s a term that’s often shrouded in mystique, whispered as if it’s something magical, and many people struggle to understand it. Executive presence is critical, but it doesn’t need to be mysterious. Most importantly, executive presence is a skill, not a trait — that means it’s something you can cultivate and build.”

And then sets out seven steps to build executive presence including:

• Have a vision, and articulate it well.
• Understand how others experience you.
• Become an excellent listener.

It interestingly also recommends that you “Cultivate your network and build political savvy”. So what you do outside of the real or virtual room also contributes to how you are perceived in meetings.

See this blog Seven Ways to Demonstrate Your Leadership Presence at Meetings which recommends

• To be influential, speak up early instead of speaking often
• Check to be sure you understand instead of assuming
• Be clear about the role you are to play in each meeting

And this blog A Guide to Mastering Executive Presence in Meetings which observes “…there is one skill that sets good leaders apart from excellent ones: an executive presence.” which “…is one’s ability to inspire confidence in others …Those with an executive presence exude a calm confidence that makes them both inspiring and approachable. The world’s most outstanding leaders have an executive presence that helps them manage workplace challenges.”

It suggests 12 rules which will enhance executive presence at a meeting including.

• Be prepared
• Start and end the meeting on time
• Use your body language
• Delegate meeting roles
• Ask thought-provoking questions
• Avoid multitasking

This skill is subtly different for virtual or mixed physical and virtual meetings. Arriving early to an in person meeting helps as you can then choose where best to sit to make an impression. Usually, the middle of the sides or the ends of a square table give you more of a command of the discussion. It helps to make a mark early by talking about some neutral topic just to get heard and be recognised as a contributing participant.
Although it is harder you can still do this in virtual meetings. Join the call a minute or so early and welcome each participant as they join. If you want some authority over the meeting, use video as well as voice. Having your image displayed gives you more presence when you are (and even are not) talking, and it shows you are concentrating on proceedings and not answering emails or taking a coffee break. 

One technique is to be the scribe. At an in-person meeting stand and take the pen to write on a flipchart or smart screen. Or be the person whose laptop is displayed on the video screen in the room. In online meetings you can do the same by sharing your screen with the meeting. Nevertheless in hybrid meetings being present in person generally gives you more authority than attending online. In particular you miss some of the asides and body language that tell you how the meeting is progressing.

Turning more to the online world I like this blog 18 Ways to Increase Executive Presence in Zoom Meetings:
“After you gain your proverbial seat at the table, don’t fall out of the chair. You can’t afford to fall on your face when it comes to presenting ideas and information to your boss, clients, or coworkers. The challenge to hold the room is more complicated than ever with meetings happening virtually via video conferencing software.”

Its recommendations include:
•             Get the Lighting Right – reading your body language depends on proper lighting
•             Keep Your Posture Positive - leaning backward, away from the camera may convey ``        arrogance and a judgmental mindset.
•             Dress for the Impression You Want to Create
Here is a good Harvard Business Review article on managing on line meetings, How to Elevate Your Presence in a Virtual Meeting which comments “Communication tactics that work well among colleagues in a conference room may not translate seamlessly to a virtual meeting. Elevating both your point and your presence in a Zoom, Skype, or similar virtual meeting requires engaging in video conference-friendly tactics.” It then suggests a number of techniques to help including:

• Focus on your camera, not your colleagues
• Frame yourself wisely
• Use the chat window as your partner

Sylvia Ann Hewlett who wrote a book on the topic (which I am now reading), Executive Presence: The Missing Link Between Merit and Success, sums all this up nicely saying certain people including Barak Obama, Sheryl Sandberg, Usain Bolt, Margaret Thatcher and Nelson Mandela had “it”.

“It is executive presence—and no man or woman attains a top job, lands an extraordinary deal, or develops a significant following without this heady combination of confidence, poise, and authenticity that convinces the rest of us we're in the presence of someone who's the real deal. It’s an amalgam of qualities that telegraphs that you are in charge or deserve to be.”
She cites research that suggests executive presence “rests on three pillars:

• How you act (gravitas)
• How you speak (communication)
• How you look (appearance)”

Of these “gravitas is the chore characteristic”.
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Executive presence demonstrates true leadership which, as Sheryl Sandberg, the American technology executive, philanthropist, and writer says, “is about making others better as a result of your presence and making sure that impact lasts in your absence.”